On the Prophet of this Age, Part I

Today, upon the mention by an old friend of DL memories, I visited my Xanga for the first time in months. As I read the posts from my first step on campus to the beginning of my relationship, I had to smile.  The youthful naivete mingled with genuine insight and wholehearted faith left a very distinct flavor.  In some sense, I wish I was as wise now as I was then - for after all, it is the foolish that God has made wise!  I benefitted from reading those reflections spiritually.

On the other hand, they were the musings of a theologically and emotionally immature youth. The past three years have changed my understanding of the world, God's grace, and the light of eternity in ways immeasurable.  I have immersed myself in thinkers, philosophers, and the Word of God, and have chewed the meat and spit out the bones.  Perhaps the biggest impact my education had on me was spiritual, and that is by far worth the expense.

My first reaction was to chuckle at the incomplete-but-good-hearted thoughts of the college freshman.  But my second reaction was to ponder afresh the dangers of "wisdom" from education.

One of the necessary characteristics of the theory major is the tendency to view oneself as a prophet of the age.  With eyes opened to the rich tradition of the past, we students were sobered, disgusted, and terrified by the state of American evangelicism.  We recognize the shoddy theology, the detachment from any substantive thought, the lack of eternal perspective.  I started as a college student with a love for contemporary worship.  I graduated with a love for liturgy, church structure, and deep study of not only Biblical thinkers but secular theologians (a paradox it may seem - but then, one cannot help being a theologian).    We are all deeply impressed by a love for the Good, and thirst after a community, in which virtue is more easily inculcated.

Yet in my studies, I was continually surprised at the cynicism of those who supposedly had knowledge of such wonderful traditions.  It is amazing to me that those whose souls have come into contact with the rich traditions and thoughts of the past can disdain those who have not yet plumbed those depths.  They can quote the right thinkers; they can tell you why your theology is wrong and why your church is unbiblical.  Their intellectual arguments are well-crafted and in general, I agree with their conclusions.  But I cannot understand how they, who have seen the glory of God, can be so bitter in their assessment of others.  How they, having come to understand the errors of their thoughts, can have no patience for those who need to be trained.

Their message is lost because there is one thing they do not understand: knowledge is a poor substitute for virtue.  Is it not the devil himself who walked in the desert with the Son of God incarnate?  And did he not himself quote the Scriptures, the Word of God?

I have all too often watched my fellow theory majors thirst for knowledge, dig into their studies with the intention of "broadening the soul."  But the reputation for snobbery is, I'm afraid, well-deserved.  In their attempts to train their minds, they have failed to apply their vast amounts of knowledge to their lives. 

The well-learned man must be the virtuous man.  If he is not virtuous, then he is not well-learned, for he has missed the most important lesson of all.  He has failed to serve the Good and serves only himself.  In that failure, his knowledge has not passed into wisdom, which is the principle thing.


I find the naivete of the girl writing the Xanga posts rather refreshing, for she wrote from a mind which feared God.  With that base, one cannot help but to become well-learned under the tutelage of the Great Tutor.  Without that base, one can only accumulate knowledge, and never wisdom.

The Art of the Commonplace: Marriage

I was jogging this morning when I caught a glimpse of the sparkly wonder that is my engagement ring.  When I exercise, or do anything that involves getting dirty, I remove all my jewelry and nice clothes in favor of grungier, less valuable things. And yet this most valuable possession of mine is always with me, whatever it is that I'm doing (excluding activities that may end up in no ring at all, like swimming at the beach!).  It's beautiful -- and not the type of thing I think of when I hear the words "jogging apparel."

And yet, there is goes with me as I run.  It is a mystery, a treasure, living in the routine that is everyday life.  It is beauty and wonder and love taking part in ordinary, commonplace tasks like vacuuming and chopping onions and taking out the trash. 

What a symbol of marriage!  A sacred institution of God, translated into everyday banalities and ordinary life.  It is a mystery, a picture of Christ and the church, a joining of two separate lives into one indistinguishable entity.  But it is also doing the dishes and watching a movie and talking through the monthly budget.  We fail to see the mystery because it is obscured by the all-too-obvious, but the mystery remains to be pondered.

Which, by the way, reminds me of something our pastor was preaching on in Revelation 21. The Church is compared to a jasper stone, which apparently is a gem very similar to a diamond.  Our pastor used the point to illustrate the glory of the church as a reflection of Christ's glory (because diamonds reflect light), but that got me to thinking again about my engagement ring.  This ring, a symbol of Josh's love for me and the worth that I have to him, is only a tiny picture of the value that the Church is to the Lamb.  Josh's investment in the ring signified his willingness to provide for me, to financially commit to me.  How much more has Christ committed to His own diamond, His Church!  How much He paid first to buy it, then to refine, cut, and set it so it would be ready to reflect His glory.

Back to the Future

In the era of relevance, "Christian hipsters," and fun churches, tradition seems pretty much lost in the woodwork.  Perhaps that's why a Presbyterian church appeals to me -- the structure and liturgies of Catholic and Anglican churches speak to my heart as the preservation of an ancient tradition.  A tradition ordained and inspired by God, and enriched by the insights and spiritual walks of millions of Christians over the ages.  I get lost in the prayers and contemplations of millions of souls, not dead, but worshiping alongside me.  Paul (I believe) said it well in Hebrews:

But you have come to Mount Zion and to the city of the living God, the heavenly Jerusalem, and to innumerable angels in festal gathering, and to the assembly of the firstborn who are enrolled in heaven, and to God, the judge of all, and to the spirits of the righteous made perfect.

This was a truth particularly close to my heart in Europe.  Worshiping in grand old cathedrals was richer for the knowledge that my soul was not alone in my worship.  Even now, my praise mingles with the praise of the millions who have gone before, and still live on in the presence of my God and my King.  "Blessed are they who dwell in Your house, for they will still be praising You!"  Though I may seem to be alone spiritually in dead American Christianity, my soul never lacks in companionship at the throne of God.

But back to the prompt of this post.  While reading in Jeremiah, I came across this gem of a verse:

Stand by the roads, and look,

and ask for the ancient paths,

where the good way is; and walk in it,

and find rest for your souls.

The ancient paths.  Even the phrase does good for my soul.  The church has no need to be "relevant" -- how much more relevant can Christ get?  But the ancient paths?  Oh, the joy of knowing that I walk after and with the souls of those who have loved and trusted God!  They have been young, and now are old, and yet God has not forsaken them.

My soul can rest in God's faithfulness as I walk in the ancient paths.  I can benefit from their struggles, recorded and passed down through writing.  I can revel in His faithfulness to them in the past, which demands my present trust.  And I can rejoice that He will use my experience too to benefit believers in the future.

The universal church is not just a concept.  It is a reality that should be meditated on and savored.  For on the ancient paths, time is eclipsed and the worship of God is the meeting place at which one generation can praise His works to another.

Hallelujah!

"That you do so more and more...."

"Finally, then, brothers, we ask and urge you in the Lord Jesus, that as you received from us how you ought to walk and to please God, just as you are doing, that you do so more and more."
~I Thessalonians 4:1

As I read this verse in my quiet time, I was thinking about when I started on-campus at PHC.  I was a good little student, and went out for a jog 4-5 times a week to stay healthy and to clear the mind.  4-5 times a week - so I ought to have been pretty in shape, right?

Wrong.  I grew more and more frustrated when, after two semesters of running consistently, I hadn't improved on stamina at all.  I would go for a run with my roommate and not be able to keep up, even though I ran more often.  I remembered back to my days of competitive running and how quick I was for a little kid, and I just didn't understand why I wasn't improving.  It's not that I didn't know how to run.  It's that I was physically not any stronger.  The next year, I dropped running and stayed in shape in other ways (one of which resulted in some pretty nice biceps ;). 

In the past few months, away from my exercise source at school, I've picked up running again.  But I've noticed a drastic difference in my physical ability.  What I couldn't achieve before after a year of running, I've attained in a month.  The differentiating factor?  I'm running in a fitness center rather than outside. My allergies, provoked by the beautiful scenery on my favorite running trail, had resulted in asthmatic reactions that forced me to stop running after only a couple of minutes.  I foolishly continued on the same path for a year, even though it was making me literally sick.

I disdain gyms.  I always have and probably always will.  I don't like the loud music that can't be turned off, I don't like having other people around during my run time, I don't like the concept of racing around on my treadmill the way a hamster spins in his wheel.  At one time, I would have been disgusted of being relegated to indoors for my exercise.  But now I'm realizing that I feel better, I'm stronger...and being on a treadmill is a great time to memorize Scripture.  Finally, I am growing "more and more" -- that is, bit by bit -- in my running ability and have almost worked back up to my goal.

My spiritual walk is the same way.  Often I "feel" like I am doing well spiritually (i.e., going for runs every day), but in reality I'm not growing in the same way.  Other days I "feel" like a miserable Christian failure, like when emotions take over.  But Paul's emphasis on Thessalonians is not in our ability to train ourselves.  It's on God's role in our sancification:

"Now may our God and Father himself, and our Lord Jesus direct our way to you, and may the Lord make you increase and abound in love for one another and for all, as we do for you."

"Now concerning brotherly love you have no need for anyone to write to you, for you yourselves have been taught by God to love one another."

More and more.  But when I try to increase in love myself, I find myself wheezing spiritually with the effort.  I'm going through the exercises, but I'm not getting anywhere because I can't deal with the problem.  My spiritual asthma -- the nagging irritating things that make people unlovable, the jealous self-seeking bitterness in my heart, the envy of the wicked and their rewards -- is a problem that I can't overcome in any way but changing the setting.

And that's to let God have His way in me.  To struggle, to fight, to strive, yes.  But to strive in the place He has for me.  To let Him teach me love.  To let Him direct my path.  To let Him make me stronger, to feel fitter, to implant His Word in my heart.

And under His tutelage, I won't run perfectly.  It'll be a while before I'm up for a marathon.  But He has already established my heart as blameless in holiness, because he who finds his strength in the Lord will appear before Him in Zion. 

Hospitality in the Church

The dreaded church search.  Yep, I did it again.  After attending three different churches during my three years at PHC, the church we were at decided that due to overflow in the building, they would cut each of the services down to one hour.  The result: 20 minutes worship, 5-10 minutes of announcements/tithe, and a 20-30 minute sermon.  Followed by another service 15 minutes later, resulting in a sanctuary and lobby so packed that fellowship was impossible because conversations couldn't be heard.  All other elements of church were moved to Sunday night service - meaning that if we wanted toparticipate in communion or get involved in a small group, we would have to forgo our service in AWANA.  And the sermons, much shorter than they used to be, lost their depth.  Milk, and not meat.  Josh and I made the decision to move on for the sake of our spiritual growth as we enter a new phase of life.

And here we are, at a Presbyterian church (neither of us have ever attended a Presbyterian church) that meets in a middle school.  The pastor spoke 3 out of the first 6 times we were there. It's small,the elders take turns preaching when the pastor is out, and the music is not fantastic (although they choose good songs).  The pastor gives excellent, deep, well-researched and supported sermons.  But then, we didn't get to hear him the first week!

What made us stay after the first week to give it a second chance is that the Body of Christ is in effect there in a way I have never witnessed in a church, particularly in the area of hospitality.

We have been attended there for almost two months.  Our first week there, we were approached by five different people who, after they found out we were moving, asked if we needed help moving.  We walked out with the business cards of both the youth pastor and the pastor with numbers to call when we moved.  And they were serious. Since we had no furniture, we didn't take them up on it (two carloads of boxes isn't exactly worth the time).  But in the time since, we've witnessed the system with which the entire church shows up to help move someone in.

We have been invited over for a meal three times.  Once, a homeschool family invited both us and another new couple over for lunch so we got to know not only a member family, but another set of newlyweds new to the church.  Yay for meeting people in the same walk of life!  The dad and the kids prepared the house and the meal for us, as mom was out of the town the day before.  We found that to be a sweet act of service.

Then just last night, a woman dropped by our apartment with a plate of warm, freshly-baked sticky buns.  "I took my daughter to college this week, so I had the house to myself and thought I'd do some baking to share with y'all.  Welcome to church!" she said.

I've attended generous churches, churches with good teaching, small churches, large churches, churches where the pastors sincerely love the Lord.  I have never attended a church so hospitable.  Maybe it's because we're not just college students anymore - college students tend to be overlooked and lumped in with the rest of the college-aged kids.  But I doubt it.  This church teaches and lives the concept of hospitality as a command.

And you know what?  It's contagious.  Ever since I was little, I didn't like having people over because I was too shy to enjoy conversation.  It is SO easy in a tiny apartment with worn out carpet, a small food budget, and only four chairs to make excuses for not having people over.  But I'm learning through this church that the quality of the cooking and the beauty of the home are not substitutes for the ministry that goes on when the church is actively building relationships on a personal level.  So we're inviting some students over for games and dessert on Saturday.  :)

May I remember this lesson forever - hospitality signifies the establishment of relationships and draws people into the Body of Christ.

Purity: Not Just for Yourself

It seems to me that the evangelical church overemphasizes some reasons for purity in teenagers.  The main argument being made is that if you do not save yourself for marriage, then someday you are going to get married and be ashamed.  That the reason for purity is so that you can be wholly your husband's (or wife's), and not have any past lovers to compare/be compared to in bed.

No wonder so many evangelical teens are hopping into bed!  If this is their reason for remaining a virgin, then why stay pure when you meet the person you're sure you are going marry?  Even more, what about once you're engaged?  You have a promise already -- so if you're only saving yourself for your future spouse's sake, what's the harm?  Why should the night before the wedding be different from the night of the wedding?  The promise has already been made and waits only for formalization before witnesses.

No indeed, to be surprised at immorality among Christian couples, we would have to be hopelessly naive.  We have offered teens a self-centered reason to stay pure, without any deeper explanation.  If they remain virgins, we promise them only the ability to avoid guilt.  We ask them to mortify their bodies for the sake of...what?  Future pleasure?  If that's the reason, and they can avoid the guilt, why shouldn't they have pleasure now?  And then we throw a cherry on top and tell them that God says so, because He wants to protect them from shame.

Yes, God says so.  But it's not all about us (that's just an added side benefit).  God yearns jealously for us and wants us to sanctify our bodies for His service (Romans 12:1-2).  He wants the virgin to be wholly occupied with pleasing God, not a man who she thinks will be her husband.  If we want Christian teens to be significantly different from their peers in the area of sexual activity, then we need to stop giving poor explanation and get down to the root of the issue.

God wants the unmarried to remain pure because their focus needs to be on God (I Corinthians 7).  The point is NOT the number of girlfriends that a guy will be shamefully remembering on his wedding day (an argument which, by the way, leads to a huge error in the courtship camp).  The point is that purity is from God.  He still loves the harlot (as in Hosea), but He longs for His bride to be characterized by chastity.  He longs for those whom He has called to be single, and who are single for a short while longer, to be devoted to Him as Paul was.

Our kids coming through the churches today need to understand that sexual purity is not something that is good because it will save them from hurt.  They need to understand that sexual purity is good because God has decreed it to be so, for His service, and that they will be hurt by fornication BECAUSE it is bad.

A convincing argument? No, for an unbeliever.  But it is the only true justification for sexual purity.  Without God's jealousy for us, there is no reason for a teen or fiancee to remain pure.

And as for what makes the night before the wedding different from the wedding night?  Vows are taken before God, and it is He who joins together.  Up until that time, when man and woman become one not through their own strength but through a divine calling, "the Lord is your husband."