How to Have a Super Productive Monday

You had a crazy busy weekend and have put some huge tasks behind you. You are looking forward to knocking things off your Christmas to-do list, starting today! It's going to be a wonderful Monday.

Step 1: The children sleep until 7:00, and wake up cheerful and patient. So far so good.
Step 2: Get everyone fed, dressed, toileted, etc. You're on track for an A+ day.

Step 3: Review to-do list. Prepare suitable Christmas-y playlist.
Step 4: Dance to Christmas playlist.
Step 5: Load up breakfast dishes and get the dishwasher running.

Step 6: Notice dishwasher is leaking all over the floor.

Step 7: Call management. They'll be there in ten minutes. Remember to be grateful for the benefits of renting.
Step 8: Pull everything out from under the sink. Grab every towel in the house to sop up water.

Step 9: Call management, again, twenty minutes later. Water is still leaking even though the dishwasher is off. 

Step 10: Ummm....anyone there?

Step 11: Management arrives. Hold clingy toddler who is (rightfully) wary of the strange loud men tearing up his kitchen.

Step 12: Management delivers good news: you're getting a new dishwasher! They'll be right back with it. Receive their full assurances that you can use the sink now.

Step 13: Replace the items under the sink.
Step 14: Clean out the filthy, mucky, muddy gaping hole that used to house a dishwasher. 
Step 15: Rinse out the rag you've been using to clean out the filthy, mucky, muddy gaping hole.
Step 16: Discover Management lied about using the sink.

Step 17: Remove everything under the (flooded) sink. Throw away the (flooded) roll of paper towels. Retrieve the last of the towels to sop up the (flooded) floor and (flooded) under-sink area.

Step 18: It's lunchtime. Realize you can't get into the fridge because of the nasty dishwasher sitting in front of it.
Step 19: Taco Bell it is.

Step 21: Keep the child up from his nap because Management will be back any second and you don't want to wake him up.
Step 22: Management will be back any second..

Step 29: Annnnnnnnny second....

Step 38: Decide you might as well put the (grumpy exhausted) child down, because Management isn't coming back any time soon.

Step 42: Management comes back ten minutes later. Child wakes up. Child is upset.

Step 43: Management installs the dishwasher.
Step 44: Management discover that the sink is not in fact usable.
Step 45: Snicker.

Step 46: Management (now wet and mucky) tells you that the problem was not the dishwasher after all, but the sink.
Step 47: Cross your fingers and hope you get to keep the new dishwasher.
Step 48: Management fixes the sink (it takes ten minutes)
Step 49:  Goodbye, Management

Step 50: Look at to-do list. Look at clock.

Step 51: Redate to-do list for Tuesday. No, you know what? This is really more of a Wednesday sort of list.

Step 52: Write new to-do list:

____Get new dishwasher

Step 53: Check off to-do-list:

__x___Get new dishwasher

Step 54: Look at to-do list. Realize you really went the extra mile, and fix to-do list:

__x___ Get new dishwasher

__x___Mop kitchen floor (BONUS CHORE)

Step 55: Recall that mopping the kitchen floor is, in fact, a Thursday chore. You are ahead for the week.

Step 56: Congratulate yourself for exceeding expectations, on a Monday of all days, and all before 4:00pm. Have a piece of chocolate.

END